Welcome! This is where it all began. I no longer post on this website and some of the content reflects former convictions and understandings. Some of these posts are hard core on issues that I am softer on these days. I deleted many posts that I feared would lead people into legalism, so if you find a missing hyperlink that may be why. These days I write at Covered By His Hand.

Thursday, April 30, 2009

A Wife's Obedience to her Husband

I haven't written any weighty posts for a while, and I have enjoyed the break. But, I have something eating away at me... I just have to get this off my chest. (This post will be half book review and half exhortation)

I read all 8 of the Little House on the Prairie series last week... and I was terribly disappointed. I was constantly frustrated by Laura's deliberate defiance against her father (Sometimes nearly risking her own life!) Maybe reading this book as a mother of a strong-willed boy (Nelson) makes me more critical, I don't know. But, at times, I did not like Laura at all.

But, what really irked me was at the end of the book The Golden Years, right before she is set to marry Almanzo. She asks him if he expects her to obey him, after they get married. They talk about how antiquated it is to speak of a woman obeying her husband, and how modern ministers will leave that word out of the wedding ceremony. I was shocked when I read this dialogue! Yet, I should not be surprised at all.

In the garden, as God sets curses upon Adam, Eve and the serpent, he speaks to Eve:
I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee. Gen 3:16 (KJV - emphasis mine)
When reading the rest of Genesis, we see that the phrase "thy desire shall be," indicates that a wife's desire will be to rule her husband. But, the curse includes this idea of constant struggle, for even though we wives want to rule, our husband is given rule over us.

So, are we to be obedient? Certainly! Is this language antiquated? Absolutely!, BUT this is no way takes away from its truthfulness. The idea of a wife submitting to and obeying her husband is repulsive to most people. We need to face the facts here... our husbands are not perfect. But this does not lesson the commandment to obey them! In fact, we are ordered to respect husbands, and there is no contingency within the Scripture that says "if/when they deserve it." In fact, Peter is just one instance of saying that a wife should obey even a non-Christian husband, that he may be saved:
Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; 1 Peter 3:1 (KJV)
Obedience to one's husband is found both in the Old Testament and the New Testament.

So, what does this look like in "real life"? Here are a few things I can think of, off the "top of my head."

- Obey in the small things, even when they annoy you. For example, you may have a full day planned, but hubby asks you to balance the check book.

- Asking questions is not insubordination, so long as it is done in the right attitude!
The women are to keep silent in the churches; for they are not permitted to speak, but are to subject themselves, just as the Law also says. If they desire to learn anything, let them ask their own husbands at home; for it is improper for a woman to speak in church. 1 Cor 14:34-35 (NASB)
- Another way I have submitted is by giving my husband full authority over my blog. He reads every potentially controversial post before I publish it. He can tell me when to erase something, or (more often than not) when to add something for clarification. I used to chafe against this, but now I see it as a blessing. I have a real feeling of protection, knowing that Paul approves of what I have written.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

My Garden - A disaster area

It has been such a cold, wet spring. We have only been able to plant a few things. Unfortunately, there has been so much rain that our garden is drowning.

I have been using these cold, wet days to snake-proof my house. I have put thick steel screen inside all of our heat registers. I am hoping that this will also keep out some of our smallest pests (the eight-legged and six-legged varieties).

Another funny story - we had a bird in the house the other day! There is a large hole in one of our screens, and some silly little wren decided to come through it to explore our house! It was a very bright bird, and it seemed relatively calm during the ordeal. We shut all the bedroom doors we could, and we darkened all the windows except for one with the screen removed for the bird to fly out. It worked! The little bird flew right out! I like wrens... but not so much in my house.

Lastly, still no test results from last Friday's blood work. I will let y'all know as soon as I hear anything! I am also mulling through a few posts in my mind about modesty, and one about submission... if only I had time to write!

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Big News...

Or, should I say "Little News?" I am expecting another baby! I will give you more specifics when I learn more. Looks like it will be a late fall/early winter baby.

I am feeling well. I will still be tested for Rheumatoid Arthritis and Vitamin D deficiency (Friday, April 24th), but I am having far less joint pain. My sleep schedule is much improved. I am getting up much earlier than I used to. I am NOT as tired as I was just one month ago. Overall, there has been a lot of improvement. I think that God has been at work answering prayers for my healing.

In other news: We still have not gotten the garden planted, it has been so cold, rainy, and windy. The good news is that the weather has been too consistently cold for storms and tornadoes! My schedule that I wrote out for planting, in accordance with the Old Farmer's Almanac, has been obliterated by the weather. Nothing got planted in March. Nothing has been planted in April. And, as for planting certain things on the backside of the moon (that would be a three-day window of April 22-24), well, that is not looking so good either...

Lastly, we are having trouble with snakes (non-venomous, just scary). Yesterday, Becca ran out of our bedroom screaming "SNAKES!" Paul and I said "IN OUR ROOM???!!!" And we found (at that time) two snakes in our window sill - good thing the window was shut!!!

Later, we saw three snakes in the window. There were two blue racers, and one black rat snake. The black rat is the one with the glossy head. The biggest is about 6 feet long!

You can see from this picture that the snakes are getting into the window through the rotted out window casings... they are actually slithering through our walls! I did not panic too much, really, I was ok... afterall, it was in the window, not my actual room. And, hey, it is ever homeschool mom's dream to have such wonderful science lessons at her fingertips, right? Now, if it was mice in the windows (or walls), I would be hyperventilating. Seriously, I have a real phobia of mice. I cannot even look at a picture of one. But, snakes eat mice... actually, the Black Rat Snake constricts them, then eats them - how cool is that?

You can believe that I am a little more upset about the snakes than I let on above. Becca was up crying in the middle of the night because she thinks she heard a snake. I had to sing her to sleep. Even Paul agrees that it is time to move from this house. Sure the rent is next to nothing, but we cannot live like this.

One last update - school is going very well! I am spending an hour every day with Rebecca and Nelson just on reading. They are gaining momentum. And, we are keeping up with all our other subjects well too. It is good to be back into a solid school routine! I teach the kids most days, but Paul helps me a great deal! And, when I am too tired, he takes over.

That is all for today's update. My parents just pulled in the driveway for a visit. I gotta go!

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Feeling Better - An Update

It is a heartening thing to know that people literally all over the world are praying for you! And, these past weeks, I have received multiple emails from blog friends assuring me of their prayers for my health. And, it seems that God is restoring my health. At this point, I don't know if it is a permanent type of healing or another remission brought on by weather.

My health:
- I can do dishes without dropping any
- I can do dishes without hand pain and cramping
- I can stand to do dishes without my knees and ankles getting so sore that I limp the rest of the day
- Last week, I could not lift my arm to write on the dry erase board for school. Today I taught school all by myself with no pain!
- I could have gotten up easily at 5 this morning
- I have not taken a nap today (And will not, because the kids will be up any minute)
- I walked up and down the driveway today... I even RAN a few yards to "race" Nelson on a bike. I could have cried (ok, I am crying now...) because, a few weeks ago - I thought I would never run again! I wasn't sure if I would ever walk again!

These are all great improvements. I hope they will last!

Another thing... though I do not like being sick/disabled, I see some value to it. I have never been more sure of Paul's love for me as I am today. I have heard him cry for me, while he thought I was sleeping. I watched him serve me again and again. He has been a most humble servant to me in my weakness. While our marriage is not perfect, I have no doubts of his love for me.

I don't ever want to paint a glossy, perfect family portrait on my blog. I seek to be authentic. I am just reporting the best news I have today, while conveniently leaving out the 2 milks spills at breakfast, the apple juice spill and lunch, etc...

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

My Confession

Any time that I make a confession on this blog, you can be sure that I am not doing it for my own pleasure. When I "come clean" in this venue, it is because I honestly believe that someone else may benefit from knowing my struggles. With this explanation in mind, I confess to you:
I am recovering from an addiction to blogging.

Psalm 42:1 says, "As the deer pants for the water brooks, So my soul pants for You, O God."

I am very sorry to say that up until last week, I was panting for blogging.
I was sitting in front of the computer for more hours per day than I would like to own to. I was hungering and thirsting for comments. I was lying awake nights thinking of topics to write about and composing posts in my head when I should have been sleeping. It was a miserable life.

Yes, I have been sick. Yes, using the computer is one of the few things I was/am still able to do. But, that in no way licenses me to sit here all day and be lazy! I could just as easily sit on the couch and listen to Rebecca read. Or sit and read to the little kids. I am sure that I could have found things to do! I let my physical disability (whatever it is) keep me from whatever domestic work I could have done.

I have repented of my blogging addiction. I have asked the Lord to forgive me and take away the thirst for information. Now, I want to challenge you!

Are you a Mommy or Daddy who has a blog or spends a lot of time reading other blogs (or both)? Is computer time taking away from your time teaching/training your children? Do you "snap" at your kids more often, because you are trying to focus on what you are reading and writing? Even if you are reading great things about the Bible, child rearing, or living off the land - are you taking away time from your family to do it?

I used to feel trapped by this pretense I had pasted myself into! I would see all the names on the Quiverfull Blogroll and feel like "If they can do it, so can I." Seriously, if women with even more than my 4 kids can keep up with a blog (or two or three!), I thought I ought to be able to do it. But, alas, I can no longer keep up this pretense. Now that I have been out of the blog world for one week, I can see a bit more clearly.

I feel like God has cut a burden from my back! I no longer have to sit here all day and watch for comments and reply to them. I no longer have to follow everyone else's posts and comment on those. It all takes so much time and energy, and I will not attempt to do it any longer! God has freed me and I do not want to get back into that rut!

I WILL keep this blog, I believe that it still has a purpose (so long as I keep things in focus.) I will still put on updates. I will still post on weightier matters when the Lord leads me to. BUT, I will no longer pant after the recognition of having a blog. I will not seek to be known among the blogging community. I no longer hunger and thirst for the blog.

"Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied. Matt 5:6 (NASB - emphasis added)